CONFIDENTIAL Released to Public SETI Case File: 3548712 ———————————————– LADY GAGA Reputed Real Name: Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta Reputed Date of Birth (Earth): March 28, 1986 Occupation: Musician/Performer Findings: Ah, how her outfits bring back memories of the fashion on Bornokovia, except for the fact that she’s wearing clothing designed for men. This could lead [...]
A press release has been made available regarding alien pornography. That is all.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Dear citizens of Earth, Really this obsession with our sexual faculties has gone too far… Here’s a closeup: Look, we’re flattered. Really. But we just can’t. No, it’s – it’s not us. It’s you… Eh, screw it. I suppose it was inevitable. You know what they say – “Once you go grey [...]
A press release has been issued regarding a disturbing ad that was discovered on the Internet. That is all.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Dear Citizens of Earth, Let’s a play a game. It’s called “What’s wrong with this picture?” Wait, don’t strain your puny human brains. Here’s a closeup: Seriously? What the french is wrong with you people? Thank God for the Internet or we never would have known. If I see one, just ONE, [...]
A press release has been issued regarding the depictions of alien genitalia in modern popular media. That is all.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE We would like to clarify a rumor that has been troubling us for quite some time now. Yes, we may be a tad vertically challenged. And yes, our spaceship is sportier than your POS jalopies. And yes, I have milked many a cow in my day… But that does not, I repeat, [...]
A press release has been issued regarding the Drake Equation. That is all.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE It has recently come to our attention that the Drake Equation has been called under question and we would like to take this opportunity to clear up some of the concerns regarding its accuracy. One evaluation of it (http://www.daviddarling.info/encyclopedia/D/DrakeEq.html) explains the improbability of contact between as there is one radio-stage civilization for [...]
A new press release has been issued regarding the Giant Skeletons of the Indian and Arabian deserts. http://setifiles.com/2010/01/24/giant-skeletons-unearthed/ That is all.