CONFIDENTIAL Released to Public SETI Case File: 2396824 ———————————————– The Westboro Baptist Church Picketers Activities: Picketing Funerals, Promoting Homophobia, Pissing People Off Findings: Yeah, right – like we’re going to take credit for these yahoos! Bornokovians have souls, thank you very much. Probability of Extraterrestrial Origin: 0/10 CASE CLOSED Public Domain Image.
CONFIDENTIAL Released to Public SETI Case File: 3548712 ———————————————– LADY GAGA Reputed Real Name: Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta Reputed Date of Birth (Earth): March 28, 1986 Occupation: Musician/Performer Findings: Ah, how her outfits bring back memories of the fashion on Bornokovia, except for the fact that she’s wearing clothing designed for men. This could lead [...]
A press release has been issued regarding the Drake Equation. That is all.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE It has recently come to our attention that the Drake Equation has been called under question and we would like to take this opportunity to clear up some of the concerns regarding its accuracy. One evaluation of it (http://www.daviddarling.info/encyclopedia/D/DrakeEq.html) explains the improbability of contact between as there is one radio-stage civilization for [...]
A new press release has been issued regarding the Giant Skeletons of the Indian and Arabian deserts. http://setifiles.com/2010/01/24/giant-skeletons-unearthed/ That is all.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE It has come to our attention that rumors persist of giant skeletons having been found in the Arabian and Indian deserts. http://fx.worth1000.com/entries/493662/giant-ancestors http://fx.worth1000.com/entries/493085/big-boy http://fx.worth1000.com/entries/18533/giants Earthlings have interpreted these to be the remains of the people of Aad (Islam), of the people created by the deity Brahma (Hindu), or of the Nephilim (Christianity.) [...]
Stardate -313034.24032851355 A press release regarding acts of extraterrestrialism in popular culture has been made available to the public. That is all.
Stardate -313033.52435312036 Agent Spork’s Day One Report has been received. Analysis to follow shortly…
Stardate -313036.9800545409 A press release concerning the incident at Roswell has been made available to the public. That is all.